1. Under no circumstances, may two men share an umbrella.
2. It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances: (a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master. (b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse. (c) After wrecking your truck. (d) One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game". (e) When she is using her teeth.
3. Any man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.
4. Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.
5. If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.
6. Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However, complain all you want if the temperature is unsuitable.
7. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.
8. On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.
9. When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.
10. You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.
When a man volunteers to do such cooking, the following chain of events is put into motion. 1.The woman goes to the store. 2.The woman fixes the salad, vegetables, and dessert. 3.The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils, and takes it to the man, who is lounging beside the grill, drinking a beer. 4.The man places the meat on the grill. 5.The woman goes inside to set the table and check the vegetables. 6.The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. 7.The man takes the meat off the grill and hands it to the woman. 8.The woman prepares the plates and brings them to the table. 9.After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes. 10.The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women.
Humor 
